6 weeks: Firsts

As first time parents, everything is new. We've had some of our important firsts in the past week.

OUTING:
This week was full of activities. We had our baby's one month Dr's appt as well as my 6 weeks checkup. Both Dr's offices are quite a drive from where we live, so it was a mini family road trip. Dave and I are getting better at packing our diaper bag and predicting her schedule - every trip feels less daunting. We also had our first family walk in the neighborhood today, which was just a short walk to pick up some coffee (decaf for me) from a few blocks away, but it felt like SUCH a big deal. I wore my baby in the K'tan carrier and topped it off with my maternity parka to protect her from the wind. She's gained more than 4lbs since birth, so she felt pretty hefty, but it felt so good to walk outside. In a weird way, I felt like my old self again.

FIRST BATH:

I was super cautious about bathing her. Of course, the first concern was the umbilical cord. But even when the cord stub came off, I didn't feel ready. Her skin seemed too delicate, and I was afraid she'd get cold. I watched videos on bathing babies over and over, trying to get comfortable with the idea. And in the meantime, I just wiped her off with warm, wet wash cloths. In preparation,  I ordered a thermometer rubber ducky (a must have!), which put me at ease about water temperature. We ended up washing her over the kitchen sink in a small plastic basin, using way too many towels because I kept drying her off just in case she's cold being wet. Our little girl looked confused, but she didn't fuss or cry through the whole process, which makes me think she might be one of those bath-loving babies like my niece, who refuses to get out of the tub sometimes. I feel like we crossed a big hurdle. 

SLEEPING:
I think I noticed for the first time this week that she seems more tired at nights. She still gets up very frequently, but it went from every hour to sleeping almost 2-2.5 hours straight (tho only once a night)! I really should take advantage of the opportunity to sleep, but I can't get myself to do it. Everything feels too delicate, like I have to watch her every second. If my husband is not up with her, I don't feel comfortable sleeping. Even if I lie down and close my eyes, even if I doze off for a minute or two, I'm right back up as soon as I hear her move or make a sound. I know I am being the waaaaay-paranoid-new-mom, but I can't seem to snap out of it. Perhaps it'll get better once she hits that 2-month or 3-month mark, where doctors say things are "safer." 

FEARS:

Being a first time mom, I feel paranoid about everything. My husband seems more lax about the whole situation, which is sometimes annoying but mostly helpful. I'm hoping my paranoia and fears will subside as my baby gets older and stronger. I'll get used to things, I'm sure.

I really need to chill out. Maybe it's time for me to get a gym membership again...

Week 4: Sleep No More

I've wanted to write about my experience on a daily basis, but it's been virtually impossible to sit in front of my computer for more than a few minutes at a time. Someone said newborns sleep a lot, so you should go out often in the first few months.... Well, apparently not my baby... She sleeps frequently, but not in any kind of long stretches. She's always eating tho, meaning she's always ON me, which makes it hard to type. This girl's very vocal about her wants/needs - she screams and/or starts crying (such a loud voice from such a little person!) if we don't respond promptly. My girl knows what she wants! I've been nonstop nursing, taking very short naps in between - no "real sleep" whatsoever. And I'm typing with one hand right now in a very awkward position with my hungry baby girl glued to my chest.

I was told newborns need time to establish a pattern and should be fed "on demand," which I have been doing. I was also told newborns usually feed every 2-4 hours (start of feeding to the next start is how you time this gap). For us, it's been mostly every hour, two if lucky. This in reality means I have about 10-30 minutes in between feedings, during which she always needs a diaper change. Fortunately, Dave is on fulltime diaper duty, so I actually get that 10-30 minute break. But still... That's not a very long time. After a few weeks of doing this, I thought maybe something is wrong. Fortunately (unfortunately in some ways...), when I asked our pediatrician the other day, she said some babies just do that. It could be gas discomfort, preventing her from eating more at a time, but nothing serious if she's pooping and peeing fine, which she is. I also asked about our baby's grunting, which she does whenever she tries to poo or pass gas. Apparently, she's just in the process of learning to do these things efficiently. Newborns are so underdeveloped and helpless. Pooping is such hard work for her!

Some mornings, I feel demoralized in my sleepless delirium. But I've been able to snap out of it after a nap, during which my husband feeds our girl with my pumped milk in a bottle. And every time I wake up - however short, I'm so happy to see my husband and my baby. She is just so damn cute. BTW, I'm now typing with two hands. I tried on my new K'tan wrap for the first time, and I think my baby likes it! And my hands are free!

Time is already going by really fast. My baby is more than 3 weeks old and 2+lbs heavier than when she was born. Her cheeks are getting chubbier every day. However cranky I get at times these days from not sleeping much - sorry husband - I am enjoying this sometimes dreadful initiation into parenthood. I say we're doing pretty well as newbie parents so far, even if every grunt, every small noise from my baby freaks me out, which I'm told is unnecessary. I will learn tho. Newborns make weird noises. I get it. But I can't help it yet that I respond to every little thing to make sure she's okay. Motherhood is definitely not easy, but it's more than worth all my time and effort, as every parent before me has told me. So I happily say (while I'm feeling relatively sane after a nap) goodbye to sleep - for a while anyway. See you later. It was nice knowing you.